Thinking of Texas

I can travel 799.91 miles back to Texas in less than five minutes. Sitting in the sun on my deck here in Colorado with my favorite gardening hat over my eyes the familiar feel of my hat and its smell of the sweet black earth I left behind is all it takes.

I miss seeing bare trees at the house we built. I remember in the fall and winter stealing minutes throughout the day to memorize the way the trees look before spring covers everything in green. The beauty of the woods is simple--- just gray--- the gray oaks, birds, rabbits, squirrels, opossums, armadillos, and coyotes. In the early morning the gray is opaque; watching the trees I see movement, the shades of gray separate into animal forms.

I miss seeing the brightly colored flowers of spring I knew. My mind playing with the meandering path of color dots, carrying me off into the past, 35 years ago, running through a field near home with my dog. We run as fast as we can until we have to stop to catch our breath standing next to each other with our sides heaving. Walking back home I’m happy in the sun, knowing I will hear mom’s voice, and there would be water waiting.

I miss the flowers and wildlife I saw every year and all of the human traits I gave them. I love reading books about the meaning of each flower’s name and then deciding which person I know matches that description.

WORDS OF WISDOM/OLD SAGES
The tall purple and white iris reminds me of Grandma Frances' advice, "Stand up straight. Keep your shoulders back." I can see Grandma tall and thin among her friends; like the iris their varying heights punctuated with showy white heads.

BEAUTY/LOVE
The viola's delicate purple flowers surprise me from behind the brown rocks of the pond. Beauty can be seen in the most unlikely places. Their large heart shaped leaves remind me love is a gift without regard to size or age. I think of the friends Grandma Frances had. A group of 70+ year old women who played cards once a week and talked of love and live, past and present.

INNER STRENGTH
The pink rose has a very feminine appearance that hides strong inner strength. During difficult times the fragile looking rose can adapt to its environment and turn back to the wild. I remember when my delicate aunt gave birth to a premature and ill son; she kept harm away with large protective thorns I hadn’t seen before.

FAITH/TRUST
The water lily opens daily to float in the sun. Each night the bud closes and hangs at the top of the water holding trapped rays of sun, confidently waiting for a new day. Mom was often sick since she'd been diabetic since she was three years old, but she pushed worry out of her mind, trusted in God, and looked to see how she could help family and friends.

PERSERVERCE
The tulips move throughout the day following the sunlight and defying gravity by moving their large heads on graceful stems. They accomplish what they have been designed to do unaware of how impossible their feat appears. Our daughter has the ability to accomplish much and I can’t wait to see her figure this out!

SHARING/MOTHERING
The sunflower opens to the size of my hat. Birds come to take away the seeds that form the center. Some seeds fall to the ground to sprout later in the season. They are like kids, standing tightly at my feet with their heads tilted up to watch and imitate momma. I think of Deborah, our cousin, and her three kids that follow her lead.

STAMINA/ENDURANCE
In August heat overtakes both day and night in Dallas. The sun's setting giving only a brief reprise. My bed of zinnias will ignore the heat and send out flame colored blooms. Their leaves will be small and often dry as the plant sends all its energy to the top. The flowers will quickly drop seeds to add to next year's zinnia army. I see cousin Sandie and marvel at her strength through years of surgeries.

SELF-SUFFICIENT/SELF RELIANT
Bugs, birds, and small animals also live in my yard with the flowers. Unlike me they live together without walls or barriers. My walls and barriers is called a house--- I'm not sure if it's to keep me in, or things out.

I miss being outdoors in Texas so I dig a garden here in Colorado to see if I can’t fall in love again. Our yard is full of rocks, but there is a raised bed by the kitchen and here we till the dirt. Pulling weeds and grasses I see results and feel satisfied; I delight in a rare instance of immediate accomplishment. As my muscles tire I don’t miss Texas so much. Digging my hands into the soil, clasping my new piece of earth I’m working towards my goal connecting by something strong and simple, mutual touch.

May brings spring

After the snow season the ground that is revealed is already celebrating the arrival of spring. Grass and moss are coming out in patches around the rocks and being joined by what will soon be wildflowers. Garter snakes come out from under the deck and sun in heaps of snake spaghetti. There is a complete family; father, mother, and two babies wrapped around each other. Their gray patterns blends in with each other and only when I look closely can I count heads and tell how many snakes there are.

Fuzzy ping pong balls, the least chipmunks, hop from rock to rock looking for food. The larger ground squirrels that compete with the chipmunks for birdseed don’t pay much attention to the chipmunks. The ground squirrels move slower and don’t seem nervous. They love to sun on rocks and roll in the light gray earth near their burrow.

Pine cones and tree branches left behind by wind and snow litter the ground. The mule deer pick up twigs, taste them, eat a few, and paw at a few. I see green breaking out of the ground and feel the contrast of soft leaves versus the stiff, sticky pine needles. Our family gets outside and removes the large pieces of dead wood so the pine beetles that have left mountain sides in the area bare don't have a base to attack from. We check the bark of the growing ponderosas looking for the little yellow cones of the bumpy waxy substance that signify beetles have bored into the tree.

Three weeks after the last snow green is the predominate color on the ground. Wildflowers are here--- a pasque flower sits in our neighbor’s meadow with six sepals that look like petals, have a purple exterior and open daily to reveal a white interior.

More snow stories

Living in Texas for five decades I was a connoisseur of year round heat and its many variations. Since moving to Colorado three months ago I’ve seen more snow than I ever have and I found out it also comes in many types.

In Texas the weather at Easter can range from beautiful spring warmth to down right hot. In Colorado this year I saw a little rain, a little snow, and then hail that covered the deck with a thin layer of pellets the size of the end of a pencil. Instead of dressing up and going to church we hunted for eggs in the house and drank hot chocolate.

Thursday night after Easter it started to snow. Friday morning there was over a foot and it was still coming down when Tad and the boys went out and made a fort in the back yard. While we ate lunch we watch the five deer we often see walking through the yard jumping through the snow. One went straight to the fort and stuck his head deep into the snow; I don’t know if he was checking out the fort or checking out the scents of our family.

By night over two feet had fallen. It was so wet and heavy tree limbs started going down across the county and electric company trucks were called to restore service to over 6,000 residents. We sat in front of our fireplace, told stories, made lists of things we needed to buy before the next storm, ate cheese and crackers, and went to bed early.

Saturday morning our neighbor snow plowed some of our driveway and helped us shovel the really deep sections so we could get out if we needed to leave. I was happy to hear this much wet snow had not fallen since 2003. I wasn’t worried about our safety, but I wasn’t looking forward to another night without hot food and light.

Saturday afternoon the house began to hum--- we had electricity--- all was right with the world! As I started cooking I realized how thankful I was to be able to cook--- something only a few nights ago I wasn’t wanting to do. And enjoying a hot shower I thought how much I take for granted.

Sunday afternoon we ate on the back deck in the sun without coats looking at the snow melting on the ground. Our house is in the foothills of the Rocky Mountains where the weather changes from hour to hour. Generally the snow is a fine powder and less than a foot deep. This means the views are beautiful and by the time I’ve shoveled part of the deck the sun is shining and county snow plows have long since freed our cul-de-sac.

Now I know snow can be a part of spring. The big snow storm gave the ground the moisture it needed and plants were budding and the grass was coming out in patches around the rocks within a week.

Today is May 18th and everything in the landscape is covered in green. Chipmunks run from rock to rock each day gathering food and sunning. I can hear birds everywhere in the trees, but often they are little and fast so I’m still trying to figure out what kind of birds they are. The deer are curious about the work we’ve done digging a garden--- they sniff all around as they sample the new grasses.

A new spring time sound I hear is rapidly honking car horns as deer or elk cross the road. The first person to see the deer or elk approach the road stops, honks several times to warn other drivers and then sits to watch the animals cross. Sometimes the procession is orderly and fast. Other times the animals double back a couple of times or stop and stare at the people staring at them from the cars.

I’m sure there will be a lot more to discover about our new home. I looking forward to finding out what the next thing will be.

April snow

Not native, that’s me. I heard the term on a recent wildflower walk and realized, yep that describes me. This year our family moved from Dallas, Texas where I was born and lived for over five decades--where I was native--to the foothills of the Rocky Mountains west of Denver, Colorado.

At first moving was only about physically relocating to latitude 39 degrees, 36 minutes, and 10 seconds north of the equator; longitude 105 degrees, 19 minutes and 17 seconds west of the Prime Meridian; elevation 7700 feet . Four months later I realize our new place doesn't automatically feel like home just because we've wanted to live here for years; now moving is about becoming a part of our new place. Our house is unpacked but my spirit is still figuring out where it is.

Each morning I wake seeing Mt Evans' peak through the tall ponderosa pines behind our house. Since our arrival in February several times I’m also greeted by snow that has fallen during the night, usually leaving 3 or 4 inches that quickly melts by mid-morning. The winter snow it a light powder that makes no sound as you walk through it. When the mule deer run through snow clouds of white swirl up from the ground. If the snow continues into the day it covers the backs of the deer as they sit behind our shed turning them to white stone until the sun comes out. At this altitude the sun is very bright and the snow vanishes quickly leaving small islands of white in pockets of shade; everywhere else the sandy ground dries quickly.

This has been a month of wet snow. Instead of snow falling it rains snow. During the largest storm the tree branches fill with mounds on snow until only a little of the dark trunks can be seen. The second afternoon of the storm I take a yardstick onto the deck and measure 24 inches of the snow. Two hours later it is only 20 inches as the snow settles. By bedtime it is back to 24 inches.

The next morning I measure 30 inches of packed snow. How much that would be unpacked I don’t know. Inside I feel closed in with snow visible out every window and door so I go outside. Shoveling I hear a swoosh, feel something hit my head, and I find myself enveloped in white--- I’ve just learned you don’t have to have sun for the branches to drop their loads, they just reach capacity.

When the wet snow is deep it takes several days to melt. The bark of the ponderosas is full of water and rough plates of rich orange and dark brown stand out against the snow. The intensity of each dark trunk matches the dark green of the pine needles high above; the tree is a unified whole that stretches from earth to sky.

Each day I learn a little more about my new home. The people that live in this area love to share information about the plants and animals. Then I share information with my family and friends so the facts cover me and slowly seep into my being. For years I was a visitor, then an acquaintance, then a want-to-be, now a resident in progress.

So long March

It's the end of our second month. We now have Colorado license plates and the cars are covered in dirt.

The school had a spaghetti dinner and games in the gym. Fifth graders served food; a choice of 3 kinds of spaghetti, sprinkle cheese, salad, and desert. We enjoyed the food but looking around I couldn't find person I knew. In the gym were ten games and everyone got a trinket. Grant got his face painted into a menacing pirate. Two dads had paints, a booklet, and a lot of enthusiasm.

Our neighbor, Jim the Great, brought us flowers to welcome us to Colorado and the neighborhood. The lilies smell wonderful and the bouquet is full of all kinds of spring colors-- white daisies, purple liatris, pink Peruvian lilies, pink carnations, pastel snapdragons, and 4 kinds of greenery. This is the first time I've used the large crystal vase we got for a wedding gift. It was worth the wait!

Spring break started a day early when the first snowstorm of the season arrived. About 12 to 14" of snow covered the deck and drifts in the corners fought for the top rail. Pikachu, Justin's cat, jumped into a snow bank thinking it was solid. She ran back inside fast and didn't try going out again.

Our neighbor, Kim, brought the boys sleds to try out. We couldn't remember where there were open areas on our property so we used the road behind the house that goes to a log cabin. The sleds fit into the tire ruts pretty well. Jim lets the boys try our his toboggan shoot. I forgot my camera but after walking through deep snow I figured my memory would have to save the image of them speeding down the hill. After going for a ride with them I want to get in shape and use to the altitude so I can try more next year.

We walked around the lake in downtown. The boys climbed up on a statue of kids and posed as many times as I asked. We saw beautiful birds sitting on cattails, pieces of ice floating in the water, retrievers swimming for sticks, people sitting of the shore fishing, people walking--- a lot of fun.

The recreation center turned out to be a favorite place. There is a swimming pool with a large slide, fountains, and a vortex area. Also there is a rock climbing wall and someone to help.

Other places we went were Build-A-Bear, Chili's, Baskin Robbins, and roaming around looking at the local sights. We didn't complete our list of places to go, but with the snow we just changed our plans and enjoyed going outside here at home.

If you click on the picture below you can see pictures from our first two months in Colorado:

First two months in Colorado

The Ides of March

I started a four-week memoir writing class the first week of March from Carolyn Campbell. In December we’d come to Colorado to look for a house and I met Carolyn, who rented one of the houses we saw. We talked a little and I found out she wrote poetry as well as painted. When we moved here I saw an ad for a class at the Evergreen Arts Center and noticed her name as the teacher. When I went to class I found 18 other students! Many of them had just completed four weeks of classes so listening to their stories was like having many teachers, and many to encourage each other.

The boys got their hair cut at Sandy's Organic Salon. They are pampered to a shampoo and careful trimming. Grant has decided he likes his hair short so he can spike it. Justin still wants his longer, but he likes the idea of looking good as much as Grant.

End of February

We've been here three weeks. One day I feel I'm getting comfortable in our new home and another day I think: What am I doing here? I've always lived in Dallas. How will I be able to adjust after half a century somewhere else?

We had our trees trimmed for fire mitigation. It made our acre lot look much bigger and the trees look nice with the dead cut off. I learned a lot from the guys cutting the trees. Now I know pines don't like to have their feet wet. That is why over the leach field of our septic system the pines are yellow. We have one spruce on the north side of the house where a drain empties. Spruces like the moisture and the tree is a beautiful dark green that is a wonderful contrast to the pines. The man we bought the house from planted trees on the north side of the house in 1979 when the pine beetles last hit the area. One is a small pinyon pine that hopefully will produce pine nuts someday. The man cleaning up the lot told me this was a tree with history from the local Indians--- somthing else to research.

In another couple of months I want to plant a tree to mark the year we moved into our house. Tad would love a flowering tree so I asked what we could plant that the deer and elk wouldn't eat. We can try New Mexican Locust, or Common Purple Robe, or Russian Hawthorne.

We had 1 to 2" of snow on the 20th. The snow is soft, dry, and melt before the morning ends. I took the boys to see a movie on Saturday. We had fun getting out of the house and becoming familiar with a part of town we can visit again. There is a bookstore, a mall, a huge Target--- places we can go when we want to come down from our mountain and go shop. The boys also told me about the animals across from their school. On Sunday we went and fed elk, deer and goats. The animals are in a wildlife preserve with giant food dispensers that give out pellets for quarters. There was a goat that bullied the deer. The pupils to his eyes were horizontal lines that gave him an unfriendly appearance; and his attitude to any animal that wanted to share the pellets we were handing out confirmed he was indeed unfriendly.

The boys both have Valentines Day parties at school that I get to go. The classes here go all out with games and foods for the kids. Grant's class makes crowns and has a table where the kids get to make their own sundaes. Justin's class plays bingo and has outdoor games. Watching the kids outside feels strange because in the background are mountains around the school.

By the end of February we are able to find our way around easier, but we are also missing the friends we left in Texas.